Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
i think i have two assholes
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Randomize