i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Is it because I queefed?
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Randomize
