The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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