he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
