lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
