She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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