Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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