I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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