i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize