ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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