is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
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