Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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