Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize