also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
