I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
