the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
