i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
i used baking grease as lip gloss
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Randomize
