ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
