Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
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