pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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