I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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