its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize
