Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Randomize
