Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Randomize
