i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize