Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
