hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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