I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
