had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize