it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Randomize
