how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
