it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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