I look better un-naked...
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
