That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Randomize
