I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize