you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
