Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Randomize
