Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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