its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
