actually, I'm a sock model
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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