So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
either way he was missing a nipple.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
