I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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