Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Fuck appropriateness.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
