Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
