I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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