remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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