i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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