Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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