Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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