its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
