Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize