I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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