Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
the condom got lost in my hair
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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